saying goodbye to Mox....

Today goes on the terrible list!!! My heart is in a million broken pieces as I said goodbye to my dear little dog..... MOXIE!!! I can't think of the days ahead when she will not be here, not following my every step, jumping into the truck.... going to dog classes. For almost 12 years (her birthday is next month) she has been a daily part of my life, and tomorrow, that will no longer be the case.

"This" all began last spring. I noticed that she was slowing down, but 11 for a cocker really isn't considered "old". I took her to the vet and he found that she had an extremely slow heart rate. We went for scans of her heart and found that her brain wasn't sending out the "right signal" to her heart. I decided to try acupuncture with her, and overall, I did see a big improvement. Not that she acted like a two year old, but she certainly had some of her old spark again. It bought us time.

A couple weeks ago, I saw the "slowing down" thing creeping up again. Not as bad as it had been in the spring, but she definitely had "quiet days".. and just as I was about to run her to the vet, she would wake up and be her bouncy self. But last Tuesday, something was different, and I took her in to see Dr. Mike yet again. He did a complete check of her, and suggested that we do another scan of her heart just to see if there had been any changes from a year ago.

On Thursday, I began to get a bad feeling, I noticed she wasn't as steady on her feet, she began to pick at her food, and wouldn't do the stairs unless I was with her. I had to coax her to go in the truck, which was really strange, because Moxie didn't like to be left behind. I wondered if the cold winter weather was taking its toll, so I let her decide if she want to stay home or go.

By Saturday, she had no interest in food. This really worried me, because she had lost weight over the summer. I ran to the store and got the fixings for her favorite... always eat meal... chicken and rice. I made her a nice warm bowl, and she did eat that... whew!!! the day Moxie doesn't eat her favorite meal is the day we are in "big trouble".
On Sunday, she wasn't so excited about her favorite meal... she ate, but slowly, almost more to please me than feed herself. I began to get a real"sick" feeling.




I watched her closely yesterday. She was quiet, picked at her meal, and just wasn't herself. I made a point of thinking that if she wasn't better this morning, we would be heading to the vet again. Last night was a long night. She acted "uncomfortable" trying to get her bed just so, then moving about again. She was very unsteady on her feet and sort of "fell" while trying to arrange her bed. I got no sleep, because I watched her all night.

Around 3:00am, she had me up.. she wanted to go out. I carried her down the stairs and let her out. Then I ran for my boots and a flashlight, only leaving her out alone for a few seconds... she "disappeared".... and I found her heading down the road. I don't know if she got turned around, or what she was thinking, but I was very happy that huge snowbanks kept her from wandering off in the woods. I went after her, and carried her back inside.

She settled on her bed and finally fell asleep, I watched TV and Moxie. Then I noticed something odd, I wasn't the only one awake... so was Camille. All the other dogs were snoozing, but Camille was sitting up and watching Mox. After a bit she settled down too, but every so often, she sat up again, and would watch Mox for a while and then settle down. I thought "she knows something".

I called the vet this morning first thing to make an appointment... they told me, "bring her in and your appointment will be when you get here"... Bless them!!!! Ed fed horses, I took care of the other dogs and we were on the way to the vet.

This time we saw Dr. Frank, he was very concerned when he saw Mox and did some "tests" on her.. "I think she has suffered a stroke" he told me. And asked for us to leave Mox with him for the day, so he could do some blood work and see if he could get some fluids in her to support her better. We left her.

As we were leaving to pick her up this evening, Dr. Mike called.... the news was not good. Her kidneys and other organs were shutting down, the fluids weren't helping.. I told him we were on the way, and he said that our choices were going to be "limited". I decided that I would let Moxie tell me what "to do"....


When we arrived, she picked her head up to see me, but that was all she could do to say hello to me. I cuddled her close and could hear that her breathing was labored. We had a long and serious talk with Dr. Mike, but I already knew what I had to do...

I had to say goodbye........

And so my little friend, who was my partner in dog classes, who made me look amazing in the show ring, who slept by my bed at night and the woodstove in the day... who even followed me to the port-a-pottty......

passed peacefully in my arms..... and my life is forever changed.

"I hope the Lord was patient today...
for He had to stand and wait,
while a little brown and white cocker
trotted thru heaven's gate...."

movie review...

We haven't "been to the movies" in ages, and now, we have seen two movies within just a month!!! Saturday, we met with the Flagg side of the family and went and saw "New In Town". We had seen the trailer at "Marley and me" and everyone felt that this was our Kassy!!!! See, aside from the fact that Nate was often away when he was in the marine corps... Kassy loved living in North Carolina!!! Who can blame her, it is beautiful there and if I ever chose to live in a "warmer climate" I think North Carolina would be high on the list... any who... moving back to New England was bittersweet for Kas. It meant being back with family, having Nate home all the time, but it also meant... New England winter!!! which she has never been fond of!!!

And so, goes the story in a way, with this movie. When it comes to seeing movies, I chose them VERY carefully... for one, it's expensive to go and see something that will probably be on DVD in a few months. And two, movies these days often are not the best either in language, actions or themes. I just don't care to waste good money on something of that nature. But this little movie lived up to all my "rules"... it was fun, absolutely NO language of "any kind", no "detailed" action (if you understand my meaning!!!).. it was simply a fun, happy, entertaining little movie!!! Perfect for family viewing or simply an outing on a winter night.

So, if you are just looking for something fun and light to watch, either take a movie night or rent it when it comes out on DVD.... you will be entertained!!!

Happy February!!!

I like the month of February... to me it's the last of the "winter months" and the fact that it's just a tiny, little month, makes me think that winter is just a tiny, little bit left!!! Sadie "won't have" a birthday this year... since there will be no "29th", but she's turning 21, so rest assured she will "find" a birthday some where!!!

After church this morning, I went down to the barn and found my dear friend Betty there. Betty has been an amazing "barn fairy".. showing up on the weekends to muck stalls for me and do what ever else she can think of. She says it gives her a horse fix, but I don't think she really understands what a treat it is for me!!!! I have been wanting to have some time with Betty to do a "driving lesson" with her. However, we have never had the timing work out, either we both had to "be" some other place or the weather was just too "darn" cold. (mostly the weather has been our reason). But today, was different, we both had a free afternoon and with the temp around 22... it felt reasonable to be out and about.

We harnessed Tonka and began to do some ground driving with him. It was fun to show Betty how the harness goes on, and talk about all the parts and pieces and "what everything does". One thing that I have now added to the harness is a nice set of bells!!! Even at a "walking pace" they make a fine sound!!!

After I worked Tonka a bit and made sure his head was in the right place, I turned the reins over to Betty. I could tell by the look on her face (a smile that went from ear to ear) that she was happy to take them. She did a really fine job with Tonka!!! I dare say, far better than I did on my very first try at driving!!! I'm not sure how many "miles" we walked behind that big boy today, it's hard to say, as we drove and chatted together.. I don't even know how much time we spent. But it didn't matter, because it was simply wonderful (and with all that exercise... the cold seemed to "disappear"!!!)

When we finished up with Tonka, I asked Betty if she would give me a hand with Mocha. It's been a while since I had her out, and I thought that after driving Tonka, Betty might enjoy the "pee-wee" version. She was all for that. So, we harnessed Mocha and did some ground work with her. I was pleasantly surprised at Mocha.. she went very well. So, I got the bright idea of pulling out her cart and see how she went with that.


Last time I had her in the cart, I soon realized that she was not comfortable pushing into the shafts. Which means, she would not turn. She did fine forward, but when asked to turn, she would either rear up a little or back up, avoiding the turn if possible. I spent some time walking her hitched to the cart and practicing lots of turns. Then the cold weather and snow set it, and the lessons came to a halt. I was curious if she would remember the lessons from last fall. I put Betty on her head to coax her in the turns if needed. At first, she did need this little extra help, but towards the end of the afternoon, Betty was walking more as a guide than a leader and Mocha was taking the turns very well.



Ed was working around the barn, moving some snow, and filling the water tank. But he was able to snap these photos of Mocha, Betty and I all working together!!! (I love this picture... looks like all three of us are smiling!!!)

Ed wanted to do a little driving with Miss Mocha... she was as good for him as she had been with me!!! Maybe we finally have a handle on this driving thing with her!!!

AND... after all that "foot work" .. it was only fair for Betty to have a try at "riding"....

This is just the kind of afternoon that I "dreamed" about "when we are living on the farm"!!!! So, Mr. Winter, you can head back to the northern land.. because we are ready for spring... and Mr. Groundhog... you best not say "six more weeks" tomorrow!!!!!

the cocoon is gone......

Brick work is progressing nicely on the farm. The chimney looks grand standing out of the roof.... now all we need is smoke!!!!! Which will happened within the next few weeks. Something so "homey" and inviting about a house with smoke coming out of it's chimney.... at least there is for me.

The garage has been the focus of Ken and crew this week. All lower walls are up, some even have their outside covering. It looks big... there is just no two ways around that!!!! Next week I think the roof will be going on, and for the most part, that will complete the full size of the house.

but, the best news of all.... the "cocoon" that was hiding the chimney and hearth is gone!!! The masons finished up the hearth this morning and they did an amazing job. Watching them working with the brick, I realize what a true talent it is to be a mason. It's one of those jobs that I think we take for "granted".... because all we ever really see is the finished product. Seeing how it all came together was very interesting.

The is the "view" that I will have from the kitchen.

I could resist pulling back the tarp and taking a peek at the hearth!!! Now, just have to get the woodstove in place!!!!!

clean up day..

After yesterday's big snow, today was a day of "digging out"... Sadie went out to get her car cleared off... and had "quite the outfit on" to do it. I snapped a couple of photos as she brushed off her car and talked to the dogs... and I heard something like "I feel like Tasha Tudor!!!" (referring to her outfit and working out in the snow, I guess!!!)

Tasha Tudor, for those of you who may not know, was quite a famous author and artist. She wrote children books and most of the time, her "stars" are corgi dogs... (hey Mandi cute books for Maya)... any ways, they were some of my favorite books to read the girls when they were little. Tasha Tudor lived in Vermont on a farm and looked as though she was a part of the 1800's in her dress and the way that she likes to do things. Sadie is pretty sure that I will be the next Tasha when we get settled on the farm....

I don't think so.......

At least not today... Sadie beat me on that one...

I arrived on the farm to find Ed moving snow. Bless that wonderful little tractor of ours!! I don't know how we would get some things done without it..

The snow blower on the back makes quick work of tossing snow. Ed has been able to keep the fence lines clear and has made a nice "road" for me to get to the manure pile with the gator!!!

Some where behind that snow bank is a tractor!!!and my roundpen...... just in case some of you might wonder how much snow we have. Course this is a banking made by plowing, it isn't the actual amount!!!! (thank goodness!!!!)

After snow removal, Ed and I went over to the stove shop... our little stove has come in. It looks so different in a crate, that I wondered at first if it was the right one.... but it is...

With help from Eric and Buzz, Ed got the stove into the kitchen!!! Now, if the hearth is finished up tomorrow, we can get it into place, and within the next few weeks, even start small fires in it. Because both the stove and chimney are new, we will have to run small, curing fires for awhile. But that will work fine, because we don't need to heat the house, and yet it will help take the chill out when Ed and I begin to work there....

A beautiful winter sunset to close out the day........

bye bye fly....

It seems "yucky" having a blog about flies... who likes them??? They're dirty, they bite, they're annoying and all sorts of other "icky" things. but, the truth is, when you live on a farm.. they are a fact of life. We did fairly well dealing with them last fall, course the horses had only been there a very short time, and the manure pile wasn't much to speak about. However, I know that next summer if will be a different story.

So, I have been doing some research and talking with some folks and have come across these little bugs that are known as "fly Predators", basically they are another little fly-type "bug" that lives off the fly. Actually, just about everyone who has flies already have the predators as it's God's way of handling the fly population. However, sometimes the flies, in good conditions...like a nice big manure pile, can get a jump on the predators and then become pests to the rest of us. I have found that you can order the predators and keep their population higher than the flies and thus, we do not have to deal with flies!!!

And this morning, (trying to be in a "spring" frame of mind) I called the company and ordered my "new friends". They will come in monthly shipments with the first arriving in May.. they are suppose to be very easy to deal with, basically, give them a few days to come out of their dormant state that they are shipped in, and take them to the manure pile and sprinkle them on. Sounds easy enough, and for the amount that I need, it runs about 30.00 a month.. so, I'm willing to give them a chance.

People who I have talked with that have used them, seem very happy with their results. Aside for the fact that I don't like flies, I have to think about out drafts with no tails!!! so for the sake of my horses, I want to do the best I can for their comfort. I'll keep you posted on the results of this experiment, but are there any blogger friends out there that have tried them.... I would love to hear from you...

And... with two feet of snow on the ground... even a yucky fly would look good just about now!!!!

here we go ......again.....

Another good ol' fashion snow storm!!! no doggie class tonite, no guys working on the house, horses locked in for the day, and I am beginning to think that spring would be a really, really good idea. Oh well, February is in just a couple of days, and then we'll see what Mr. Groundhog predicts.

It's a little hard to tell from this snowy photo, but there is a chimney coming up thru that roof!!! The masons finished that up yesterday. (they are back at work once again for those of you who are curious!!!) All they need to do now is finish up the hearth... which I believe that will be done on Friday.. and that part of the project is done!!! check it off the list.....and the next roof project will be shingles

What is this creature that appeared out of the snow??? Needless to say, keeping the floors any where close to dry today..is totally out of the question.

We plow the road each time we go to the barn to check on the horses. That actually works out well, because it's easier on Ed and the truck to do "small amounts of plowing" verses waiting for it to end and then try to move it all. As the day has progressed, the snow has become more intense, and it's snowing harder now than it was at 6:00 this morning.

Ed was out at the woodpile, getting the box filled up with some of the excellent wood Rick brought last fall. We had some old wood that needed to be used up (before it rotted completely on us) and now that it's gone, we are into Rick's pile.

We're pretty happy to have it, even if I didn't get it "properly stacked" last fall.

So, an evening to be at home, cuddled by the woodstove... just hope there is something "good" on TV tonite....

this is SO my life....

A friend sent this to me... the minute I read it, I thought.... "are they talking about me??!!!" this is soooooo my life....

"If I didn't have a dog(s)...

I could walk around the yard... barefoot.. in safety.

My house could be carpeted instead of tile and vinyl.

All flat surfaces, clothing, furniture and cars would be free of hair.

When the doorbell rings, it wouldn't sound like a kennel.

And when the doorbell rings, I could get to the door without wading thru fuzzy bodies that have beaten me there.

I could sit on the couch or my bed the way I wanted, without taking into consideration how much space several furry bodies will need to be comfortable.

I would have money and no guilt to go on a real vacation.

I would not be on a first name basis with six veterinarians, as I put their yet..unborn grandchildren.. thru college!!!

The "most used words" in my vocabulary would not be : come, sit, stay, down, out, leave that!!!!

My house would not be corded off into zones by babygates,nor would it look like a day care center with toys all over the floor.

My pockets would not contain things like "poop bags", extra leashes and treats.

I would no longer have to spell certain words... b-a-l-l/ t-r-e-a-t / c-a-r-/ c-a-m-p/ b-a-r-n / w-a-l-k

I would not have as many leaves inside my house as there is outside my house.

I would not look strangely at people who claim that one dog or cats.. ties them down too much!!!

I would look forward to spring instead of dreading "mud" season.

I would not have to try answer the question of...

"why do you have so many animals?" to people who will never have the joy in their lives of knowing they are loved unconditionally by someone as close to an angel as they will ever get.

How empty my life would be........

a good night for praying...

I have a list of blogs that I read daily... but tonite it seems that my blogger friends are in need of prayer, and each one that I read made me feel a little sad... so, as I list them off, you will all know "who I am talking about" and I want to say that you will all be in my prayers tonite.... my friend that is home with her little one as her hubby serves our country, my friend who just celebrated a birthday and found that she has been laid off from her work of 11 years, my friend who's hubby has had surgery and they are waiting for "healing time" to see if the surgery has "worked", a friend who finds herself a bit "short of hay" and needs to keep watch that hay isn't stolen from her property while she waits for more... some of these friends, I know personally and others are "internet" friends, but still, you are all in prayer for blessings from the Good Lord. They (the blessings) will come.........

more farm news...

So, look has turned into Miss Social!!! I simply can not believe the change in Annabelle, every day she is friendlier.... she will allow me to pick her up (not for long) and likes to sit on the wagon seat and keep track of all that goes on. She has a "new game" of hiding under the wagon and jumping out at you!!!! Usually this is pretty funny, but there have been a few times, where I had a rake full of manure and being jumped at, has found that rake full all over the barn floor! She gets great enjoyment out of that!!!

The showers and tub arrived this week, they looked strange sitting out on the "front lawn"...but, this is the time to get them in.. before the walls are done. They aren't very fancy, just a basic white color, but both shower stalls have "seats" in them.


It is our plan to be in this house for a very long time, so we have tried to plan "ahead" in that the showers are easy access, the down stairs door openings are wider, and we can put a washer/dryer on the first floor, as well as a bedroom. I'm not excited about the truth that, we are at the very (VERY) beginning of those "golden years", but if thinking ahead now makes it easier later.. I hope we are just being "smart"....



It took all four of the guys to get those showers in!!! I'm glad Ed didn't think that he and I could do it!!!

The second wall of the garage has gone up. I remember last winter when the barn was in "this stage"... it looked so huge and out of portion, so I'm not panicked when I see this. Rough framing looks so very different from the final product... at least to me.

There is no doubt that this IS a big garage... it's four car to start with, but Ed designed the ceiling to be high with the idea that he will be able to do some restoration projects in it. He has a couple of antique trucks that he would like to do over, and he needs a high building to bring the trucks in. I am just hoping that he will finally have a place for all his stuff!!!!

caught ya!!!

Since moving to the farm, Ed has had more time to be around the horses. He is really enjoying them, and has become "very comfortable" around them. Today, I caught him doing what many of us "horse folk" do...

"wasting time"............ just watching and enjoying the horses as they played out in the pasture. I personally, enjoy many things about our horses, but simply watching them, being with them is one of the greatest joys... I am sure you will all agree.......

miss "tude"

"poor Mocha" has been locked in for the past couple of days. She keeps escaping from her part of the pasture and going in with the big horses. It wouldn't be such a problem, except that we find, once in a while, the big guys like to chase her. She isn't afraid, but with the snow being so deep, I am afraid. I worry that if she slipped or tripped up, they could run right over her!! and when one is 1800lbs (ish) and the other just 200 lbs. (ish) that sort of a "crash" would not be good. so, until we had a little time to add one more strand to her fence, she was locked inside.

The "big guys" were very interested in our project, Tonka was certain he could help me (or maybe he just thought that bag was full of treats!!!) Duke and Silver kept a careful eye on Ed... just to be sure that he was doing "his part" correctly!!!!

Once we let Mocha out of her stall, she went to her place of "escape" and found she could no longer get thru.... she was NOT a happy campers, and began to tear up and down in her paddock... "Miss Attitude!! ( or "Tude" for short!!) well, just too bad....one thing about these "minis" they are all horse... and they don't let you forget that for a second.

We had a number of visitors on the farm today... Chris and Lisa took a drive up to see us, and while they were there, a neighbor popped in to see how things were going. Then Ken (who helped Ed build the barn last winter) popped over with a friend of his... so all kinds of going's on. And there is one sad note to share... we lost another guinea hen. Two of them have been outside for the past couple of nights, and this afternoon, I found them both. One was still alive, but sadly the other had been grabbed by a hawk (I found what was left of her)... I am hoping the one alive will "make it" she was pretty cold when I finally got her in... silly birds, I don't understand why they decide not to come in some nights.... any ways, that takes us down to four of the original seven... I hope I won't lose any more....

a blog for CHRIS...

It has been brought to my attention, (from very good sources), that some of my most dedicated readers feel a little sad when I don't remember to write about them. Well, we simply can not have any unhappy readers!!! so... CHRIS... this blog is just for you!!!!!

hey..... OSHA!!!

the "raising of this wall" probably wouldn't meet with OSHA standards... but who's telling???